I'm drifting back again to that earlier decade - sort of like inhabiting one of those flying dreams where we scan the clouds hurriedly and travel in some weird, angelic, time-lapse photographic way back to the year 1977 - the fulcrum year of my development - a year of brief hope before malaise and stagflation - standing as a wonderful marker between that "earlier time" of "before" which encompasses the 60's, 50's and 40's leading back to the War itself - and the afterlife of adulthood known to me as the 80's, 90's, 2000's up until the present now ...This decade that I have overvalued in so many ways and built-up in my nostalgic brain, but which for me because of my age and description - stands as the all-important portal...There I am again standing on the open green field, that seemingly infinite vista at Poly High School - playing catch with Ralph - and being overcome by a slew of overwhelming emotions...The fastball is coming at me but my my eyes can't see well enough to retrieve it into my glove...Pride in hand-eye coordination - so previously taken for granted is fading - and I seem to be going blind momentarily - or finally rather shedding my youthful 20-20 vision...It will be a few more years until I recognize while driving haphazardly during a rainstorm that I need glasses to correct nearsightedness...But this feeling of being waylaid by oncoming baseballs - not even my favorite sport by the way - is symbolic of some sort of abrupt end to youth and childhood... Looking out at that iconic field - situated so cozily in the nice part of town - off Victoria Avenue - I feel again like I'm bumping up against one of the boundaries of my small world....To the west lies Newport, Hollywood, Burbank, Beverly Hills, Malibu - all of these mythic L.A. locales that people like me understand only very dimly from what images we catch of them on television...
Prologue - > We are fortunate to live in a time, or so it is said, when we of the future no longer feel the burden of gender to such a degree as in previous ages; nowadays there is no pre-established norm or "role" for us to perform or hold onto like a chain about the neck. There was a time, of course, and not so long ago, when men were de facto expected to be tough strong, resilient, athletic, assertive... and which to judge by the role models in movies and popular culture which we could add on silent, stoical, protective, while no great shock was registered if there should be a woman or more than one who in some degree was known (also through popular culture, movies, novels, songs, etc. in comparison with her male counterparts) as: soft, demure, flirtatious, sociable, wise, and to which one might add on: practical, prescient, intuitive, gregarious, solicitous, nurturing and perhaps multi-tasking, socially-aware, loyal, resilient . With regard t...
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