Skip to main content

Conflicted spells Ambivalence...

I maintain that Freud was right about us in one respect - that whatever our professed opinions might be on the surface - there is always a hidden current of thought and feeling that flows in a different direction... full of messy, inappropriate, hostile, aggressive, irascible impulses - directed outward at various outside sources of irritation and aversion. These repressed "sentiments" (I hate x, y, z...) have a way of inserting themselves into our daily train of thought,  trickling into our speech patterns, making for unexpected gaffes, over-reactions, out-of-kilter behaviors, white-lies,  double-standards... making us feel for lack of a better word, conflicted - at least on the inside, ambivalent, more susceptible to insensitivity than our otherwise liberal-progressive consciences would care to admit.....to acknowledge to this sub-current of aggression hiding in the shadows doesn't mean that our conscious opinions (of peace, love, cooperation, tolerance, urbanity, inclusivity etc. etc.)  aren't still the more important ones - does it? -  the ones we identify with most of the time. If the "bad thoughts" are somewhat, fleeting, peevish, whimsical and involuntary, then what do we have to worry about, right? Isn't this comparable to the power of suggestion (we all hate broccoli, right?) or when our minds absorb random impression from the outside world - a loud noise, a noxious odor, a grotesque image - it did not originate with us, but it's still becomes included into our stream of thoughts - part of our ongoing consciousness nevertheless... But why then do we hold onto such thoughts or feelings? Is this some kind of OCD tendency? How much does this underground reservoir of repressed this and that really determine who we are...There lies Freud's question to us...

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Suburbs

 I have spent much of my early life in the suburbs and after a brief stint in the big city - with its noise, crowding and cramped spaces,  I find myself immersed again in this familiar realm - an environment that seems part of my destiny. I've always thoughts of the suburbs as a place meant for children - where children can feel safe and protected - with non-busy streets and clean sidewalks - room to ride one's bike or go door-to-door selling cookies. To consider how many of our early impressions and sensations were spawned by this largely artificial world...How different such a milieu is from other places on earth, war zones, rain forests, Siberian outposts, tiny mountaintop villages or large sprawling mazes of high rise apartments in vertically-inclined mega metropolises...The suburbs are a place where a definite order and routine can be imposed...where regularity is king... lawns get mowed on time, shrubs are trimmed, garbage bins are placed at the curb and returned to thei...
Post a Comment
Read more

1974

Prologue - > We are fortunate to live in a time, or so it is said, when we of the future no longer feel the burden of gender to such a degree as in previous ages; nowadays there is no pre-established norm or "role" for us to perform or hold onto like a chain about the neck. There was a time, of course, and not so long ago, when men were de facto expected to be  tough strong, resilient, athletic, assertive... and which to judge by the role models in movies and popular culture which we could add on silent, stoical, protective, while no great shock was registered if there should be a woman or more than one who in some degree was known (also through popular culture, movies, novels, songs, etc. in comparison with her male counterparts) as:  soft, demure,  flirtatious, sociable, wise,  and to which one might add on: practical, prescient, intuitive, gregarious, solicitous, nurturing and perhaps multi-tasking,  socially-aware, loyal, resilient .   With regard t...
Post a Comment
Read more

The "Endless Summer" Feeling a.k.a. "Time Stop Mechanism"

Growing up out west - we had what was known as the "endless summer" feeling - a moment in the summer when - not Time per se - but hectic, anxious, nerve-wracking time would come to a standstill. Change would still happen of course, things would continue moving, interacting, but at a slower, more predictable pace...the rhythms of summer would take over with sunny days giving way to balmy nights...a certain degree of repetition would lend structure to this seeming "pause" in the action...Clouds still move across the sky, waves still crash against the shore, traffic on the roads, people walking, biking, swimming - but all in a self-contained world over which one had some semblance of control..Long days at the beach, lying in the sun or playing tennis at the community college, watching the heat rise on the pavement, shooting baskets on the outdoor courts, sitting poolside at a neighbor's house, sitting on the lawn at dusk, staying outside on summer nights with no wi...
Post a Comment
Read more